I think....

that I just got over it.
by it I mean him.
I mean I really think I did.

& Now I just want to live, because I feel like I'm free now.
& I realize I felt I had to be perfect for him.
No more.
It's done.


peace & love

Music Recommendation:

From yesterday:
9 Crimes - Damien Rice.
I also love his song Accidental Babies. Both songs are beautiful piano pieces, but they aren't upbeat. And if you are in a real happy-go-lucky kind of mood I wouldn't suggest them. They are almost both kind f depressing, but they are both beautiful.
I rediscovered Damien Rice earlier when I was thinking back to seventh grade, when I had problems I would listen to Damien Rice, City and Colour, Missy Higgins, & Keri Noble. Then I slowly discovered The Jonas Brothers, and I was brought out of my sad song stage.

But there it is.
HEY it's music monday, tell me some suggestions. seriously, I really need something new.

peace & love

Not to sound self -absorbed

But I love it when people take candid shots of me. I just like seeing how I look from others peoples views. Anyways Shelby took this picture of me while we were at the spree.
But I shouldn't say that, because we didn't go the spree, we hid behind it sat on the grass, and talked because we really didn't want to go. Then my mom came and picked us up.
I just guessI hate the spree because it's like time to show off how many friends you have, and lets be honest I have like 5 friends. Not that I would show off my friends, because you know, thats dumb.


I don't have much else to say.
11 days till chicago.
I got the cutest black pencil skirt for FIFTEEN bucks yesterday. What a DEAL.
Watched Gran Torino, it was sooo good surprisingly.
Started Water For Elephants, continuing it tonight.
Failed my written drivers ed segment one test, retaking that monday and then the road part.



My question for you : Seen any good movies lately? Tell me them, even leave a review if you like.


peace & love

Pop Icon

He will always be remebered.
RIP MJ.
Your music will still be danced too.

"Whatever throw your shots. At the end of the day, I know who I am as a person."

-Kevin Jonas


Smart, smart man. From the Rolling Stone article, I can't wait to get the actual thing and read it all. Drivers Ed has been absolutely HORRIFIC. Honestly, I'm a bad driver, I will admit that, but it doesn't help when this guy is probably the biggest jerk ever. I have been driving with him four times now, so that means I have only spent about four hours with him, but the douche bag thinks he knows my whole life. Today he said to me "Have your parents ever told you that you are the type of person who makes last minute choices that are bad? because you do?" I didn't really know how to answer this. It just aggravates me so bad, because the second I get in the car with my mom , I'm an OK driver, but when I'm with him he just annoys me so I drive bad. END OF STORY.
On another note, that picture up at the top, is the new polaroid camera Emily got me for my birthday (which was the 31st) It's from '52 I think. And it is absolutely BEAUTIFUL. Although we may not be able to find correct film for it, just owning it is enough. I may get an '80s style one from my moms work that I can actually use, but this one is so special that Emily got me. So I am VERY thankful.
Last, I want to thank my six followers, I know my life isn't that entertaining, but I hope I might get a smile out of someone (:

Well I have to get going, I would like to finish off the two episodes from season one of Friends, plus I have to start one of my summer reading books for Advanced Language Arts. I might also try to get in a hundred or so crunches.

my question to you: What is your summer read? (even if not for a class)
peace & love

Watching The Secret Life Of The American Teenager marathon...

I thought I would catch you up on somethings. I went to a Tigers game on friday vs. The Brewers. Let me tell you I'm not the sports time, but when I get there at the game, I'm a pretty competeitive person. BUT there was a rain delay, and we went home because of it. On the plus side, I got my FIRST ever baseball cap at a game :

& My first hotdog at a baseball game. I don't have a picture of that though. Saturday was my momma's bday, so I spent it with her, and I hope she loveddd her presents, she seemed like it though.
Sunday was fathers day, and I will put this picture in, to show how much I love my dad.

That is the DOWNRIGHT NASTIEST picture of me ever, but I love him enough to put it on.
That's about it, I have driving from 3:30 - 7:30 today, pooo. Then I get to see my beloved Jenny at 8:30. I miss her very much. But on the brightside, thursday I'm done with Drivers training, and then I'm free for the summer. Except for my AP homework for the summer.
I have to read these books: The Grapes Of Wrath, & Water For Elephants. Again on the brightside, while I was picking those up, I picked up a copy of "According To The Rolling Stones" Which is penned by the Rolling stones, so I'm veryyy excited to read that.

My question for the day: Are you going to watch the premiere of season 3 of The Secret Life Of the American Teenager?

peace & love

I have a lot to blog about...

BUT I will save it for Later and just do my sunday recommendation.
It is a song today.

Now I recommend listening to the NON acoustic/live version of this song. But this was the best video I could find of it.
The song is Wild Horses - Rolling Stones. Now I had to pick a list of my top ten favorite songs of all time, this would be on it. I love the Rolling Stones, that is true, but this song is so meaningful to me.
Plus Mick Jaggers voice is so unique.

So my question to you is, what is your sunday recommendation?
peace & love

Drivers Ed, girls night, Friends & things of that nature.

SO just to update on some things, 1st Drivers Ed.
I can successfully say Drivers Ed is the WORST. Its like 9th grade all over again, plus for some reason my teacher has some personal vendetta against me, and I am not exaggerating. I have many stories about her, first she told me because I wrote on a piece of paper I had to pay for it. Which makes no sense, I mean honestly how much could one piece of paper cost? Like ten cents. I'm going to throw a dime at her on the last day, and see how she reacts. Second, I was chipping at her wall with my pencil one day (I told you it's boring.) But anyways I got yelled at, which I kind of understand, but seriously if she could be a bit more, less - boring, these things wouldn't happen, know would they?
Topic two : Girls night.
On wednesday, Emily, Shelby, and I had a fun night, because emily was leaving the next, so we did each others nails and hair :D It was like you see in the teen movies, kind of lame,but pretty boss at the same time, you know. Then we watched Role Models, which was actually pretty funny, but unfortunately, I fell asleep in the last ten minutes, so I don't know exactly how it ends, but I got the gist of it. Plus, I love me some Paul Rudd. Which brings me to our next topic :
Friends.
So it's my all time favorite show, and recently I got season 1 on DVD, and I'm going to progressively get very season, but I'm not even done with season one yet, so this will take a while. I sincerely idolize Jennifer Anniston, she is so funny on this show, as well as in Marley & Me (SADDEST MOVIE EVER.) But I noticed that Ross (played by David Schwimmer) reminds me a lot of Justin (played by David Henrie) on WOWP, and sometimes Rachel (Jennifer Anniston) reminds me of alex (Selena Gomez) which is creepy because Ross & Rachel hook up, and Alex & justin are brothers & sister, which would be NAST. I can't believe I just talked that much about Friends, wowww.
And last I thought I would just put up my summer schedule right now, it's a little late, and it's subject to change, so I will post later if that happens.
7/10/09 : Jonas Brothers - Chicago
7/11/09 : Jonas Brothers - Chicago
7/13/09 : Coming home from Chicago
7/26/09 : Jonas Brothers - Detroit
8/5/09 : Mitchell Musso - Pontiac
8/15/09 : Leave for annual camping extravaganza
8/22/09 : Come home from annual camping extravaganza
8/26/09 : Jonas Brothers - Columbus
8/27/09 : Honor Society - Cleveland
8/27/09 : Jonas Brothers - Cleveland
10/3/09 : Taylor Swift - Grand Rapids (pending)

Tell me if you will see me anywhere!

Don't let them get inside your head.

So I'm just going to bring up the fact I haven't actually talked about my life in this blog lately. So I think I will post some pictures with some stories I haven't been telling.

06.06.09
We were driving out to a hotel (by we, I mean Beth, Brooke, Shelby, Emily, and myself) in which we thought Taylor was staying (call it stalking. But we didn't meet her, cause she stayed in her bus) Anyways we technically hit some guy, but he hit off our sideview mirror, but he was much worse damaged, yet he kept driving, we did the right thing, he did not. Sucks for him.Anyways, we had to get the mirror back on, so in a random neighborhood (which I may add was a very wealthy neighborhood.) Emily, shelby, and I went searching for duct tape, and a very nice lady gave some to us, and this is what we came up with. I was proud, and now I think I could become a mechanic. hahaha

05.31.09
My birthday. The colors actually look really cool, cause Shelby edited it. Anyways, Jenny, India, and Emily needed pictures of Shelby & I for a final in photo, so we tried to be "fierce", and well I guess it didn't work. But it still makes me laughh so hard, and that gold shirt I bought at the thrift store for about three bucks, probably my best purchase ever.

My favorite video of "eliza" ever. Aka Emily, she will probably kill me for this, but it makes me laugh so hard.


EVERYONE SHOULD PICK UP A COPY OF LINES VINES AND TRYING TIMES
peace & loveee

I forgot recommendation sunday....

Season - The Summer Set
i just downloaded this song today, and I love the lead singers voice.

Confession #6

Confession 6: One time I was painting my nails black at a friends house, and it accidently like exploded onto the carpet, and I felt so bad, so I sat on the spot the whole night so she wouldn't know. I still feel guilty now.

MY words of advice:

Everyone is blessed with a life, but it is our choice whether or not we live it. Laugh everyday, and when you need to cry, just cry. Scream and yell, and run. Make noise, and live with your eyes wide open, it only happens once. Do things that scare you, and say what you want. Never censor yourself, show people how much you love them, and if you love love someone tell them. Wear what you want, love what you want, do what you want, sing how you want, dance how you want, go to the concerts you want to. & never ever let anyone else tell you who to be. just live, and breathe.


peace & love.

Chasing stars to loose our shadows,

I don't really feel like expalining my life today, it's not bad ,just not interesting.
But I have been thinking alot about growing up lately, because I haven't. I'm fifteen, and I love disney, I'm not admitting I'm mature, cause I'm not. But it feels like I am growing up right now, I realized while sitting in my first drivers ed class the other night. There I was first time in drivers ed, getting mad because I couldn't study for my first finals. In driving, we were talking about being 21 and 25, the teacher made it seem so close, but I'm only fifteen.
I want to be naive about life still, and I want to believe in silly things, and learn from my mistakes, I don't wanted to be an adult who gets in trouble for small things.
Like tonight in driving, I got trouble because I chipped a whole in the wall (that's how boring it is) if I would have been 10 still they would have gently told me to stop.
I also realized this when an old friend said to me "you and emily used to be so crazy, and just laugh none stop." now, I feel like I don'y laugh enough. I don't want to evantually get to a point where I cry more than I laugh. I don't want to loose the feeling of awe when I step out on a cloud-less day. I don't ever want the music to be too loud. I don't ever want to think that going to five concerts of the same band and same show is ridiculous.
I just..
I don't know.
What I really want, i stay in bed forever.
peace & love

Hey Sunday!

I have 1 full day of school, and 3 half days of finals :P then I'm officially NOT A FRESHMAN ANYMORE. To those entering freshman year, be prepared.
Anyways, it's sunday, and i have spent my day
1. Studying for finals, which is no bueno.
2. I went driving for the first time, in a cemetery. I'm really no good, and according to my mother I hit the break too much. I also almost ran over a grave. creeeepy.
3. I visited my grandmothers grave for the first time. It was really interesting, because I never met her, so it was almost like meeting her for the first time, which was nice. But it was sad because I never got to know her, which is not nice.
4. Watching Sonny With A Chance allll day, Demi is so quirky on this show, it makes me want to hug thee shoooooot outta her. Plus I can't lie, Sterling Knight has the best smile ever.

SO yesterday i stalked Taylor Swift's hotel, she never came out. Whattta bizzznitch. It's alright I forgive her.
Anyways you know what time it is? I know what time it is.
SUNDAY RECOMMENDATION
Mitchell Musso's new albumm, love him (:
Also
Hot Rod, andy Smaberg is genius.


What's your current favorite song?

Confession #4 & #5

Confession 4: If I ever rebel I'm dying my hair the same color as Hayley Williams. My Fave (:
Confession 5: I studied to remember all of the guys of FTSK names and faces so when I met them on April 23rd I wouldn't sound like an idiot. My plans got canceled, but now I know them all so well. one day I will meet them and be a suppper fan!

peace & love

What you mean to me:

I just felt I needed to do these real quick, what you mean to me:
Emily: Since second grade I have known you.You are such a wonderful girl, honestly. You were blessed wit hthe ability to make people happy and laugh, and I hope you always use that. We have beeen bestfriends for so long its hard to remember the memories, but we have so many. And that's what you mean to me, someone to depend on, because everyone else has left over the years, but you have never strayed. I have never once worried about you leaving me, you are my rock. You are stable, and sensible, which I never will be either so you complete me. You don't get to emotional, so when I do, you take it. You cry with me, and you laugh with me. Things have happened and you were there, and you have never told a soul. You were there when I needed you, and you were there when we were both ugly. From my happiest to my saddest, to my bitchiest you have been there for every important moment. God blesses you in my life for a reason, and I will never doubt that.

Shelby: I met you in seventh grade, and you told me about the mean girl. I don't know if you will remember that, but I do. It makes me so happy to remember that, because you trusted me right off the bat. You make me smile uncontrollably, because you are just a smiley person. You are beautiful, and you make me jealous sometimes :/ Anyways, you trust me, I trust you. We cry in public together, and that's alright. You have dreams, and I have mine. We talk about everything, and you just listen. The ability you have to actually care about my nonsense complaining amazes me. You let me play guitar badly for you, and you act like im the best. You just are such a good person, and no matter who tells you the opposite, DONT LISTEN. When I lock myself in the bathroom, your the first to hug me, and tell me you love me. You accept my weird-ness, and accept my weird ways, and I accept.
I have told you everythig, and you have never gone behind my back, and you have never talked about me. You were there when I screwed up big time with that girl. God blessed you into my life as well.



I love both of you, more then anything.


"She was given the world so much that she couldn't see, and she needed someone to show her who she could be."

My favorite quote of all time:

"So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be."

-Perks Of Being A Wall Flower, the book.